{"id":3514,"date":"2026-01-09T14:27:17","date_gmt":"2026-01-09T14:27:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/?p=3514"},"modified":"2026-01-09T14:27:26","modified_gmt":"2026-01-09T14:27:26","slug":"the-worst-painful-moment-ever-of-my-entire-life","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/the-worst-painful-moment-ever-of-my-entire-life\/","title":{"rendered":"The worst painful moment ever of my entire life"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>There were nights<br>when tears were my lullaby,<br>and days when sleep refused to come.<br>I pulled away from the world,<br>closed doors,<br>closed curtains,<br>closed myself off<br>until silence felt louder than noise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>My smile faded with every sunrise.<br>I felt like I was slipping,<br>like I was losing myself piece by piece.<br>There were moments<br>I questioned my worth,<br>questioned my place,<br>questioned why I was still here.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I stayed indoors for days,<br>hoping, quietly,<br>that someone would reach out,<br>ask if I was okay,<br>offer a shoulder<br>without judgment,<br>without mockery,<br>without endless advice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I prayed for a miracle.<br>I wished for an angel<br>to come and take the pain away.<br>I tried to distract myself,<br>funny videos,<br>loud music,<br>soft songs,<br>even fear,<br>but nothing changed.<br>The pain stayed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I was drowning.<br>My ship was sinking.<br>And even then,<br>I didn\u2019t know how to ask for help.<br>I didn\u2019t let anyone swim with me to shore.<br>Loneliness became my shadow,<br>and I reached the lowest point<br>I had ever known.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>One day,<br>I will tell the full story<br>of how I survived the hurricanes,<br>the valleys,<br>the fires,<br>the deserts,<br>the storms.<br>It was never easy,<br>but I made it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You only know<br>what you think you know.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>What was shown,<br>not what was carried.<br>What was said,<br>not what was survived.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Before you judge anyone,<br>remember,<br>you never walked their nights,<br>you never held their fears,<br>you never paid the price<br>for their silence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>People wear stories<br>you will never hear.<br>Battles are fought<br>behind smiles you applaud.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>So pause.<br>Soften your voice.<br>Leave room for grace.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Because knowing a moment<br>is not the same<br>as knowing a life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And if you see someone quiet,<br>someone distant,<br>someone who no longer explains themselves,<br>be gentle.<br>Not everyone who is silent is empty.<br>Some are surviving storms<br>they do not have the strength to describe.<br>A little kindness costs nothing,<br>but it can be the reason<br>someone chooses to stay.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/share\/p\/17te4HYo25\">https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/share\/p\/17te4HYo25<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/i-strongly-fell-in-love-in-the-wrong-arms\/\">I strongly fell in love in the wrong arms by walkingshadow<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed is-type-video is-provider-youtube wp-block-embed-youtube wp-embed-aspect-16-9 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<iframe title=\"Turns Out I Was Right \u2013 I Saw It Coming but     Spoken Word by Walking Shadow Poetry\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/xacEsG4Cyfg?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There were nightswhen tears were my lullaby,and days when sleep refused to come.I pulled away from the world,closed doors,closed curtains,closed myself offuntil silence felt louder than noise. My smile faded with every sunrise.I felt like I was slipping,like I was losing myself piece by piece.There were momentsI questioned my worth,questioned my place,questioned why I was [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[121,97,25,98,1],"tags":[35,49,34,67,50,61,55,53,22,48],"class_list":["post-3514","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poem","category-poetry","category-solitude","category-storytime","category-uncategorized","tag-poems","tag-poetess","tag-poetry","tag-preciousowoko","tag-spokenword","tag-spokenwords","tag-stories","tag-story","tag-walkingshadowpoetry","tag-walkingshadowpoetrykenya"],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2790,"url":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/embracing-me-by-walking-shadow-poetry\/","url_meta":{"origin":3514,"position":0},"title":"Embracing Me by walking shadow poetry","author":"walking shadow poetry kenya","date":"October 24, 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"For so long, I lived in fear,Afraid of being alone, drawing nearTo friendships that felt forced,Relationships that were broken and coarse.I thought being with others would fill the void,But deep down, my heart felt destroyed. I chased company like a lost little child,Filling my life with connections so mild.I forced\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;POETRY&quot;","block_context":{"text":"POETRY","link":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/SPOKENWORDSandMODERNDAYPOETRY\/poetry\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"man sitting on bench","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/pexels-photo-1666779.jpeg?fit=800%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/pexels-photo-1666779.jpeg?fit=800%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/pexels-photo-1666779.jpeg?fit=800%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/pexels-photo-1666779.jpeg?fit=800%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2381,"url":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/moment-of-defeat\/","url_meta":{"origin":3514,"position":1},"title":"Moment of Defeat.","author":"walking shadow poetry kenya","date":"June 23, 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"In the quiet of the evening,When shadows stretch long and deep,I sat with my thoughts heavy,A mountain too tall to leap. The day had been a battle,Every step a weary stride,Each effort met with failure,No solace found inside. I tried my best, I promise,Pushed through the doubt and fear,But every\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;POETRY&quot;","block_context":{"text":"POETRY","link":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/SPOKENWORDSandMODERNDAYPOETRY\/poetry\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"cold snow man person","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/06\/pexels-photo-7279061.jpeg?fit=800%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/06\/pexels-photo-7279061.jpeg?fit=800%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/06\/pexels-photo-7279061.jpeg?fit=800%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/06\/pexels-photo-7279061.jpeg?fit=800%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2620,"url":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/broken-trust-by-walking-shadow-poetry\/","url_meta":{"origin":3514,"position":2},"title":"Broken Trust by walking shadow poetry.","author":"walking shadow poetry kenya","date":"September 8, 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"I never thought it would come from you,The one I trusted to see me through.I shared my secrets, my hopes, my fears,But now those memories bring only tears. You were the closest, the one I believed,But in the end, it was you who deceived.I thought we were stronger, thought we\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;POETRY&quot;","block_context":{"text":"POETRY","link":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/SPOKENWORDSandMODERNDAYPOETRY\/poetry\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"two women sitting on white bench","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/pexels-photo-1549280.jpeg?fit=1200%2C849&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/pexels-photo-1549280.jpeg?fit=1200%2C849&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/pexels-photo-1549280.jpeg?fit=1200%2C849&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/pexels-photo-1549280.jpeg?fit=1200%2C849&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/pexels-photo-1549280.jpeg?fit=1200%2C849&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":3377,"url":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/unspoken-truth-about-daddy-wounds-can-really-mess-you-up\/","url_meta":{"origin":3514,"position":3},"title":"Unspoken Truth about DADDY WOUNDS CAN REALLY MESS YOU UP","author":"walking shadow poetry kenya","date":"July 29, 2025","format":false,"excerpt":"I needed you, but you weren\u2019t there,Not just your body, your love, your care.You were a shadow behind closed doors,Present in name, but nothing more. You taught me silence, not with words,But by the things I never heard.No \u201cI\u2019m proud,\u201d no \u201cI see you grow,\u201dJust empty stares, and \u201cI told\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"poem","link":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/SPOKENWORDSandMODERNDAYPOETRY\/poem\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/download-4.png?fit=720%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/download-4.png?fit=720%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/download-4.png?fit=720%2C900&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/download-4.png?fit=720%2C900&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":3155,"url":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/shes-no-longer-here-but-her-love-still-fills-my-heart-by-walking-shadow-poetry\/","url_meta":{"origin":3514,"position":4},"title":"She\u2019s No Longer Here, But Her Love Still Fills My Heart by Walking Shadow poetry","author":"walking shadow poetry kenya","date":"March 31, 2025","format":false,"excerpt":"I used to wake up with tears in my eyes,Wishing, just for a moment, I could turn back time.Losing you felt like losing a piece of myself,Like a book missing its final chapter. At first, the pain was unbearable.Every morning felt heavier than the last.I would hear a joke and\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/252fa3bb5c6bcc16764146bf2270bea7.jpg?fit=236%2C420&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":2604,"url":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/a-battle-i-never-chose-by-walking-shadow-poetry-kenya\/","url_meta":{"origin":3514,"position":5},"title":"A Battle I Never Chose by walking shadow poetry Kenya.","author":"walking shadow poetry kenya","date":"September 7, 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"I\u2019ve carried this weight since I was a child,Rejection met me when I was too young to understand.The words they threw stuck like barbed wire in my skin,I grew up wearing it like an invisible cloakTrying to be good enough, trying to fit in. I learned early how to smile\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;POETRY&quot;","block_context":{"text":"POETRY","link":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/SPOKENWORDSandMODERNDAYPOETRY\/poetry\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"calm man with flowers on pavement","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/pexels-photo-5714746.jpeg?fit=805%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/pexels-photo-5714746.jpeg?fit=805%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/pexels-photo-5714746.jpeg?fit=805%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/pexels-photo-5714746.jpeg?fit=805%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3514","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3514"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3514\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3516,"href":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3514\/revisions\/3516"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3514"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3514"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/walkingshadowpoetry.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3514"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}