<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I didn\u2019t always believe that saying,
it felt like something people used
to excuse damage they didn\u2019t want to fix.
But lately,
it sounds a little too much like my own footsteps.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019ve been paying attention to myself,
the quiet patterns,
the small choices that don\u2019t seem loud
until they cause something meaningful to break. I\u2019ve noticed how I pull away
right when things start to matter,
how I say things I can\u2019t take back
just to feel like I\u2019m in control once again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It\u2019s strange,
knowing exactly what will hurt you
and still walking straight into it
like it\u2019s familiar ground.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When pain finds me,
I don\u2019t sit with it.
I don\u2019t ask it questions.
I run.
Not always with my feet,
sometimes with silence,
sometimes with distance,
sometimes with words sharp enough
to cut the very people who stayed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And the worst part?
They didn\u2019t deserve it.
Not the friend who kept checking in,
not the one who loved me gently,
not the family that stood close
even when I made it hard.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Yet somehow,
they end up carrying pieces of a storm
they didn\u2019t create.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We\u2019ve had the same conversations
more times than I can count.
The kind where apologies sound familiar,
where I promise change
but return with the same habits
wearing a different face.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I can see the exhaustion in their eyes now.
The quiet kind.
The one that doesn\u2019t shout
but slowly stops expecting anything new.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And that realization,
that I might become someone
people have to protect themselves from,
that sits heavy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So this year,
I made a decision.
Not a loud one,
not something I announced to the world,
just a quiet agreement with myself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
To stay.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
To stay when it hurts.
To sit in the discomfort
without reaching for destruction as an exit.
To pause before reacting,
to feel without turning it into something
someone else has to heal from.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019m learning that pain doesn\u2019t have to travel.
It can end with me
if I\u2019m willing to hold it
without passing it along.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I won\u2019t pretend it\u2019s easy.
Some days I still feel the urge
to fall back into what I know,
because chaos can feel safer
than being honest and still.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But I\u2019m trying.
Not perfectly,
not all at once,
just honestly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And maybe that\u2019s where it begins,
not with getting everything right,
but with choosing,
again and again,
to not let my wounds
become someone else\u2019s story to recover from.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
(11) Facebook<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n Walking Shadow Poetry – Grow from what\u2019s meant to kill you.<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n <\/p>\n\n\n\n