I used to give.
And then I gave some more.
Even when my hands trembled,
Even when my soul ached.
At first, I felt proud,
Being the one who showed up,
Who answered every late-night call,
Who made space for others even when I had none left for myself.
But over time, I noticed something.
They only came around when they needed something.
They treated me like an option,
Not a priority.
I gave love,
I gave time,
I gave energy,
I gave pieces of myself that never returned.
Meanwhile, they offered excuses.
They stayed silent.
They gave just enough to keep me holding on,
But never enough to feel whole.
Still, I kept giving.
Because I believed kind people should.
So I gave.
I served.
I stretched.
I broke.
Eventually, I saw the truth,
That wasn’t kindness.
I ignored my own needs in the name of loyalty.
I loved them more than I ever loved myself.
I called it patience, but really… it was pain.
So now?
I’ve stopped.
I won’t carry the weight alone while they stand and watch.
I won’t clap for those who never show up for me.
I won’t pour from an empty cup and wait for someone to notice.
From now on,
If it’s not mutual, I walk away.
If it drains me, I pull back.
If it wounds me, I let go.
If I show up and they don’t, I stop showing up.
Because I deserve peace too.
I need people who fill me like I fill them.
I deserve to feel chosen,
Not used.
And yes, I’ll still love,
But I won’t lose myself again.
I won’t forget how it feels to be held.
I won’t confuse pain with loyalty anymore.
So here’s my vow:
No more overgiving.
No more begging for the bare minimum.
No more shrinking just to keep others close.
I’ll give where I’m valued.
I’ll invest where growth flows both ways.
I’ll stay where I feel seen.
I’m not a bottomless well.
I’m not a plan B.
I’m not here to prove I’m worthy again and again.
Starting now,
I choose peace.
I choose balance.
I choose me.
Because I finally understand,
Loving others should never mean losing myself.
They Promised to Meet Again…But Death Came First
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